My Growing Pains

In an effort to fulfill goal #6 of my list of things to do in 2015,

I have spent days now sorting through items in the attic and purging many an item.  Today I brought down a box of Bishop's toys.  Most of them had already been organized by kind in bags so that we could get rid of them.  We did this about two years ago and I remember having problems letting go of them then so I tucked them back up in the attic to deal with at a later date.  Today is that later date.  I had Bishop look through the bags and tell me what to do with them.  He sat on the bean bag chair, looking into the bags, pulling out Bionicle containers and remarking on the coolness of these toys.  Then he closed the bag and said, "Get rid of them."  My heart ached a little bit.

When I watched him examining the cool contents of the bag I caught a glimpse of the little boy that he once was.  The charming, vibrant little boy that he once was; a boy that brought me indescribable joy and delight.  When he closed the bags with the declaration that they should go that boy disappeared and before me sat a man.  And I wondered, did I relish enough all that that boy offered me?  And I marveled at how much I miss those days.

Then I took a good look at that man sitting before me, the one so willing to let go of the things of his childhood, and I marveled at who he has become - a charming and vibrant young man.  A man whose company I so enjoy, who teaches me so much and challenges me to grow.

Just yesterday Bishop and I spent nearly two hours in a meandering, yet intense, conversation.

Several days ago Bishop and I watched Sense and Sensibility.  Yesterday we began to watch Pride and Prejudice.  We really didn't get very far before we paused to discuss the themes prevalent in Jane Austen's work, the time period in which she wrote and some of the author's biographical information.  We discussed how she may have established an archetype of sorts that is seen in contemporary romantic comedies.  This led us to discuss the fantasy archetype established, in part, by J.R.R. Tolkein.  Which, in turn, led us to discussing the folktales and such that influenced his work and his relationship with C.S. Lewis.  We found a great article about this friendship and the challenge that they issued each other to write about the realm of the divine in a way that hearkened back to medieval literature, that would capture the imaginations of men.  Somehow, I cannot remember now, this led us to impressionistic paintings and then, of course, to Van Gogh.  We talked about how he may have come to cut off his ear lobe which then led us to explore the artist Gaugin and examine some of his work.  Again we seemed to make a quantum leap from Gaugin to probability and yet another one from probability to the differences in the ways that we "think."  A while back a question was posed, "Do you think in words or pictures?"  I think in images.  Bishop surprised me with the answer, "Neither really.  I think more in sound."  This intrigues and mystifies me; as my way of thinking does him.  We spent significant time trying to figure each other out.  Bishop kept throwing out words and asking what I saw.  "Portrait."  "A bust of a person."  "A specific person?"  "Non-specific."  Or "Red" "A swatch of red."  "Like an entire field of red?" "No, like a red paint smear on a white background."  This totally fascinated him.  I learned that when hearing a story read aloud Bishop does create an image of sorts in his head but it is different then the way that I do it.  I have images constantly running through my head, not always detailed (ie. not always facial features, etc.), but consistently being developed as the story unfolds.  Bishop doesn't do that.  When something catches his attention in a particular fashion he develops very detailed images in his head; otherwise, there are no pictures in his head.  We then moved on to talking about Bishop's relationship and fascination with sound.  How when the keyboard was set up he would play a single sound or series of sounds over and over, analyzing them then layering them.  I suggested that he might enjoy using a mix board.  We discovered Launchpad and listened to examples of it being used.  When all was said and done we had covered a lot of territory and I was actually a bit mentally fatigued.
It was a good evening and it reminds me that my life is very rich presently
The moments of joy don't come in the form of watching Bishop build Bionicles and create alternate worlds with elaborate storylines anymore.
They come in different forms.
Forms that are just as delightful.